All quiet on the western front....almost

One of the givens for most couples when deciding to get married is having kidlets. When it doesn't happen easily and often even when it does , it becomes the be all and end all, The Holy Grail. Once the stork brings you one or many bundles that smell deceptively delicious, the world changes and life revolves around them ....feeds , soaking nappies,organic food, toys...toys...toys........food..........toys....and not a wink of sleep for yourself.

You can only imagine what they'll be like when they grow up,even when they start school ,It seems so far away that you forget that one day you'll be just a couple again. Who is that man that stomps about the place shouting " can you please keep child number 3 off the ladder and out of my toolbox!"...."Why is child number 1 sitting on child number 's 3's head?"......."Child number 2 is covered in paint...don't let her touch...ANYTHING"........"is that glitter in my socks?"

But eventually they grow......and leave home.

Each of the leavings has been hard for me as a mum....I'm an "I like to know everything about my kids" kind of mum, and an "I really like like my kids company" kind of mum......even if they drive me nuts and I'm hiding in my room....I come out eventually.

Chloe the eldest left home a young man of 17 to go interstate to study 3d.She was staying with my 72 yr old aunt and pretty lonely. I had the other 2 at home and kept busy and daily phone calls and knowing we were moving closer when the house sold all helped.The young man is now a young woman named Chloe and although we don't speak everyday we are still close.I think she needed that space to help make her life changing decisions.

Gemma didn't leave until she was 19 and went to live in the same sharehouse Chloe was in, we chatted on the phone,I visited and she came back home when her course was finished. She had so much stuff and I had my computer in her room and we sort of went back to how it was when she was 15,so she got a place of her own around the corner.She now has a partner and because she lives so close I see her every few days.

Danny decided at 17 he wanted to move to Qld and try for work there. We bought his car so he would have some money while he was looking.I was beside myself. Empty nest syndrome. He is very independent and I had to call him all the time.He didn't NEED me! what the hell? I was like a stalker, the feeling is very much like being dumped by a narcissistic boyfriend!!! After 3 months and a bout of what was probably swine flu, he headed home again.

Now he's off again. He's been accepted into the army as an electronic warfare operator/language specialist....secret squirrel stuff. I'm going to ask him every Christmas are aliens green or brown?

In a month I will have an empty house again.

I had a look at empty nest sites and found some advice..

stay in contact but don't make a nuisance of yourself.....ok....hmmm is ringing to see how the day went...everyday...a nuisance??

If you are finding it hard not to be emotional on the phone, then send an email instead.Ha ..I don't think this kid EVER reads my emails .Can I be your friend on face book? No.

Am I going to miss these things?

doors being left unlocked

dirty dishes piling up in the bedroom and then the sink,

wet towels left lying on the bathroom floor.

Don't you want to save some of the pizza for your dad?

Wasn't there any change?

Mum...make me a sandwich

Mum...is the kitchen closed....at midnight

youbetcha!

Empty Nest (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman was feeling depressed.
(Her syndrome is called “empty nest.”)
Her home was too calm.
She missed being a mom—
Though her spouse “helped” by being a pest.

I

Some days you're the windshield... other days you're the bug.

It's funny how in the Blogoshpere that the lives of you people I didn't know say 2 months ago can so quickly become a part of the fabric and ..well... matter. I'm only a new follower to Redhead at randommicrothoughts and she doesn't post everyday. Just Saturday she posted that she'd had a bit of an overwhelming rollercoaster ride , with a mammogram on Wednesday week ago, a biopsy last Thursday and on Saturday the Dr CALLED her with the results. Life has changed for her in that instant and she's had no time to digest it. She was scheduled for a mastectomy on Monday just gone.

Of course there is nothing new on her blog ,it will be the last thing on her mind. She has no list of followers on her blog and only there's only a few she follows on the page but if you've got a minute and want to leave a well wishing message ,It'd be nice.

I know I know I'd love it if I got home and found a gazillian get well messages from "strangers" LOL some of us more strange than others ! he he

Redhead, if you see this in the coming days :

abcirclepro and a mexican peso

I buy all sorts of things on ebay.

I love a bargain.

I also need to exercise.

I see those long long ads every day and I..... @.@ ......@.@...I.... liked the look of the abcirclepro .

I know I will never have flat sexy abs, but thought perhaps I could gain a waist at least .Hmmm, I could get one cheaper on ebay!!!! Yep 50 bucks free postage from Hong Kong.KaChing... Your alarm bells are ringing? Mine didn't,I've bought lots of cheaper items from Hong Kong and never had a problem, only one bad buy, small flashing lights that go on the tyre tube air intlet thingy,they fell apart but hey, they did work for a few minutes.

So with visions of the new slim me after only 3 minutes a day, I hit the buy now button and payed with my papypal. About 2 days later I get an email from ebay telling me they've cancelled the listing due to suspected copyright issues. What the? I already paid. Grrr. Thats Ok I have paypal protection. I filed for a refund but had to go through the usual give the seller a chance to reply thing. I get a note.."Its Ok project is all good, item is good , I send." Note from paypal to say they have sent a tracking number here 'tis.

Yesterday I got a card in the letter box than an item needed picking up. Not sure how big the box was and weather it was heavy and would need hubby and not me(I'm weak) I rang the Post Office.

Me: "How big is my parcel"

PO.."well its not very big"

Me:Does it need Les to pick it up ?"

PO :" cough giggle...NO"

Me: "Oh must be light then?""Ok I'll come up and get it.

I got an item....it is a circle........

See You in The Funny Papers

My blog is funny tonight but it's not me being funny, it's my friend in the USA who's funny.I kind of adopted Dani by long distance.Hope her mum doesn't mind too much.I've been her internet mum for about 10 years.Shes had a rough trot with some issues and I'd love to see her art business take off,mostly because she is so good at it.

She is an amazingly talented and clever cartoonist .She can put YOU or your family or friends into comic strips by using your own funny true stories. Send her your story and pictures of the people who are in the stories and she will put them into a cartoon.She has some examples of work she has sold on her site here. Very reasonably priced and you can pay by paypal.

She also has a blog on the site here .

I hope you enjoy her work as much as I do. Its a really unique way of honoring a family member at Christmas or birthday etc

Lots of fun with some embarrassing moments I think .

.

Google knows ALL!

Nothing very exciting happened this weekend other than my birthday which is not so exciting when you're creeping up to 50. Scored a big box of Belgian choccies from my son, half gone already...phone calls from the girls and Hubby took me out for a chinese meal at the local bowling club.I put my $3 in change through the pokies and head home to about 110 facebook birthday messages. oh and google wished me a Happy Birthday too.When I opened the google page there was a cupcake with a candle and scrolling over there was "Happy Birthday Bernadette" Google knows all.
then on my google profile there was streamers falling all over the page,they didn't capture very well but..you get the gist.

I was playing around in google and found lots of random questionnaires,so here are a few I answered. Feel free to pinch them.

Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet?only bigots and homophobes.

How do you flush the toilet in public? There is more than one way? I press the button.

Name one thing you worry about running out of....milk and sugar for my cups of tea.

What famous person do you (or other people) think you resemble? My sister in law told me she thinks I look like Rosanne Barr....sigh...

Do you crack your knuckles? No I can't.They have flattened out from Rhuematoid Arthritis, On some fingers I don't really have knuckles.

What song do you hate the most?Song Sung Blue.

What's your most annoying habit?I'm just annoying apparantly so I can't really pin one thing down...not doing things straight away drives hubby nuts. Popping in to my sons room with random questions or conversation annoys the crap out of him.

Where are your car keys?Where are my car keys???

Where did you last go on vacation?Bali, I've been 3 times .once 24 years ago and twice in last 18 months. Saving to go again at end of 2012.

What 3 things can always be found in your refrigerator? half a can of beetroot, leftovers from a day/week/3weeks ago, milk.

What superstition do you believe/practice?hmmm I knock on wood, cross my fingers and I don't much like walking under ladders or breaking mirrors.Just in case you know.

If you could go back or forward in time,where would you go? The years before I started school I got fed, played all day,such a slothful life really I didn't even have to bathe myself. Everything done for me and lots of cuddle time.

Do you parallel park or drive around the block? Now I'm in the clown car I parallel park, but must confess in the bigger car,I went around the block. I once had to take some things to a 2nd hand store in a trailer on the back of my car. I planned the route so that I did not have to reverse at all. Straight ahead driving the whole way.

Which shoe do you put on first?Oh come on....left.

Look at your planner for March 14, what are you doing?I don't have a planner,so the same as everyday. Nothing.

When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?Oh God, how long before the abcirclepro arrives? Mostly I forget to look in the mirror at all though.I have no idea what I look like, when I do see my refelection, it's "who the hell is that fat.... and old lady?""Who let her in?"

How much cash do you have on you? ha 65cents...I'm skint.

If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be? WELL , I'd take the money honey...flying's for the birds......

Memories on Friday.

I'm coming up for half a century in a couple of years time. Looking back over that time I can remember inventions that we thought back then were amazing. Way before mobile phones, ipads and mp3 players. We couldn't even imagine those things being real back even in the early 80's.

Some of the things that were "new" when I was a youngun were:

Portable transistor radio, these were still quite big, but put about a dozen D sized batteries in and you could take it to the beach it would run for a good....40 minutes.

My father had a habit of leaving it slightly off station so our music was accompanied by the horrid static white noise .I'm sure it's why I'm a bit nutty now.

Palm sized transistor radio...no earphones you had to hold it to your ear for your own personal space, they had a real tinny sound but it was great.It was awesome to have music of my choice in my own room.This was actually a big deal in my house. Odd ,yes ,Personal freedoms were a privilege.

Portable Record player

I was never lucky enough to have one of these but my friends did. I remember one 11th birthday party listening to Fox on the Run by sweet,over and over and over and over.I included the song, so you can get into the excitement too. You may want to play it over and over and over,thats ok .

Cassettes These were a huge thing in the late 70's and 80's. They were only about $2 cheaper than LPs or records as we called them but they started putting the cassette players into cars and the portable transistor radios. They were expensive for what they were and often got loose and you'd hear mwaaaarrr mwaaarrr mwaaarrr and not much else. There used to be lots of unravelled tape at traffic lights, a sight you don't see anymore.I just gave our collection of about 150 cassettes to our brother in law, he bought a campervan with a cassette player in it. It's all 70's and 80's music. I hope he gets more than mwaaaar mwaaaar mwaaaar out of them.

1970 brought us one of these rotary phones, not everyone had an in home phone then but in the next few years,not many homes didn't have one.Before that we used these.

Mum was lucky we had one in our street a few houses down, but some people had to walk for ages then wait their turn for the box.

I remember my mum buying one of these u beaut electric typewriters in about 1985. We were researching the family tree and mum would type up family groups etc. We also used it for our resumes.She tried to give it to me about 6 years ago we all had computers with printers by then.It's still in the back of a cupboard.

Thanks to the Japanese, by the time I got to highschool in 1975 calculators had been introduced for maths.Legions of students never had to remember the formula for cosigns and tangents.

Not that a calculator helped me, I was hopeless at maths.

I keep finding these in drawers.I think they breed.

In 1974 the sewer finally came to my home town. We could have had a pump out septic for about 3 years prior but Dad was not going to pay the plumbers twice,so we put up with this....
for 3 years longer than we needed to. There was no light in there, plenty of spiders and it only got emptied by the sanny man once a week. God help us when we had visitors.

I'm glad some things have changed!!!

YAY an award

Unaccustomed as I am to speaking...................I've written some notes on the back of my hand...

Many thanks to twighlightgazing for the LOL award,i love it :) I have secretly coveted one of these,and since I don't think I'm very funny, I thought I'd be coveting for longer.

This award comes with some rules,not many thank goodness,not that I don't follow rules,I do....well I have good intentions of following rules ,but I do have a poor memory and need a bit of a hit upside the head with the rule book occasionally.

ok rule 1...Link to the person who gave you the award.....easy...thanks twilightgazing. Love your blog ,glad I found you :)

rule 2...Pass the award on to 7 other people who make you laugh....Oh ... and let them know they have an award,which I will have to do tonight or I will forget.

rule 3...Say 7 things thats people don't know about you or at least you think they don't know. This will be a hard task for me,i'm a blabbermouth and most things about me are out there already.

rule 4...Pass the rules on.... ok got all that?

7 things about me no one knows.............hmmmm...........brain ticking....give me a minute...........maybe more than a minute.........

ok..

1...I was a mad ABBA fan in 1977/78. I was 14/15, my walls were covered with posters,I babysat every weekend I could and used all the money to buy the LP's(for the young people,they were big round black things that went under a needle on a turntable) and magazines that I could glean info and pictures for my scrapbook.My friend used to dress as Agnetha and I would dress as Frieda.No, I never had satin hotpants, thanks for asking. I had a ticket for their concert in Sydney but my father refused to let me go because of the huge storm. BAH!!! I cried buckets.

2...I have been mistaken for Asian all my life. Odd really because I have the UK convict ancestors and Italian grandparents on Dads side. People (usually drunk) would try and guess my nationality. And my middle daughter has the same now,only she looks Polynesian.

3. I sang at the Sydney Opera House. True. The Concert Hall,no less. It was me and about 20 of my schoolmates in a choir,in a school Choral Concert competition.Along with 20 other schools. We were the first group to sing there in 1974. The Opera House had only opened in December,so it was hugely exciting. We all wore white. The sound was amazing,I stopped singing so I could listen for a few minutes.

4. I hadn't kept in touch very well with any school friends, and to my joy (thankyou facebook)I've now caught up with my first best friend from Kindergarten. We were friends right through primary school, walked the gauntlet into highschool together on the 1st day,but got put in different classes. For 2 years we had separate friends but were good friends again in our last 2 years of school.Once we left school though,life took us in different directions.We are still in different parts of the country but ti doesn't matter. Its been awesome to find each other again and we seem to have picked up where we left off. Everything's changed but nothings changed.

In the photo I am middle row 1st child on left K is 4th from left.

5...I cannot not eat chocolate. If it's in front of me,it's gone. If it's the last one...it's mine!

This is not me in the photo.Kind of you to ask.

6... I feed my family on about $150au a fornight.this includes groceries as well. I make it stretch...far. After all the bills are paid or put away for, and bits squirreled for xmas and the Bali fund,thats all thats left. We don't each much meat. But I have to borrow off hubby for cigarette money dammit.(and he makes me pay it back)

7...I can pretty much sleep anywhere, tv on ,people talking etc,so long as its not loud repetative noise and I'm reasonably comfy,I can sleep.I'm that person snoring loudly on the train or plane or on your couch.

7 blogs to pass the award on to

sandra @ absolutelynarcissism she probably has a dozen or so of these...here's one more...she absolutely cracks me up :)

lemon gloria always a funny post, I enjoy reading.

whispering writer @ airing my dirty laundry one sock at a time

ameena @ fancy this fancy that

lyndylou @ the giggle fest....the name speaks for itself :) I'm not the first to give her one of these...she will have no secrets !!!

Mrs Tuna @ Working Woman's Guide to Dinner or If I Cook Chicken A La King One More Time I'll Kill Myself

Bill Y @ It's good to mock...even though he hates Bon Jovi

This took longer than a real blog!!!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I can't leave yet...can't find my....

The lovely and funny Lyndylou from The gigglefest has tagged me in the 5 things you can't leave the house without meme.

1. Keys...I hardly walk anywhere, so the keys to the car are a must have. But mostly I can't find them, there is a 10 minute continuous circuit of the entire house looking on top of things and under things and even behind things to unearth these pesky things....every time.I swear I put them in the same place every time. They must be like chameleons ,changing their appearance to blend in with their surroundings. This has to be the explanation....because I have 2 sets!!!

2. Glasses- the world is blurrier without them. I lose these regularly too, I had to drive for a week without them using my eldests' first pair of glasseson the end of my nose as a decoy for the police if pulled over.

I think they are in cahoots with the keys.

3. A bra. A definate must, these OO are looking more () () and I surely couldn't wear a belt with comfort if I didn't wear a bra.

4. My purse- even if I take a handbag, I tend to take my purse out and leave the bag in the car which is probably how my fake Bali Prada bag went missing.It's just dissappeared,probably somewhere waiting for the keys and glasses to come back.

5. Cigarettes- yes yes I know, bad for the health,stinky etc but I enjoy them though and hate leaving home without them.I'll buy another pack and a lighter if I forget either.Yes I'm addicted.

My friend sent me this awesome e-ciggarette, great little gadget, I just have to get some more e-juice and a battery charger and I won't be spending so many dollars($16au a pack of 25) on the cigs or drawing in the dreadful tar.And, I can smoke..sorry ,"vape" to my hearts content amongst the non-smokers.They have some great flavours with or without nicotine, rum and raisin quite strikes my fancy :)

Thanks lindylou,that was fun.

Now to pass it on............I love you all.......throwing names into a hat and...presto...

ami @ ami.mental

ameena@ fancythisfancythat

julianna @ surviving boys

twilightgazing

lisa@ blue and shoe

Fartarse Friday!

I am being tired and lazy but can't leave my blog blank...........so

Here is a game to keep you occupied while I think of something blogworthy.

I'm pretty sure most of you know each other from blogging so this should be interesting

Here's the game and how it works.

I start off with a question, the first persons answers it then asks a question which is then answered by the next person who asks a new question . I wonder how long we can keep this going....wait...that's not my question.

My question is :

Whats the silliest movie you've ever seen and would you watch it again?

I got a ticket to ride but she don't care

Well she does care actually.

I got a traffic infringement today. $256 I can't afford. Dammit.

No , not for speeding. Failing to stop at a stop sign.

I'm a careful driver,I drive like an old lady, my kids tell me this all the time. I don't think this is entirely true, the old ladies in this village take 1o minutes to reverse park between two cars parked a mile apart and I'm not THAT bad. But I do wait at giveways for EVERY car, it drives the kids nuts, they can get a truck through that gap etc etc blah blah .....It's just white noise after a while.

I took the short cut to our country road home,hubby is"why are you going this way for?"

"I like going this way , It misses all the roundabouts in the main street,I always go this way"

" no you don't we were here last week you didn't come this way"

"well the kids go this way and I like it"

I turned left at the stop sign and I had to give way to a car on my right ,so I presume I stopped..I didn't hit it ,so I'm pretty sure I stopped?

I got about 500m or more up the road when I heard a siren, not sure where it was coming from I glanced in the rear view mirror a couple of times , and after a minute or so sure enough, flashing lights and a speeding cop car, so I pulled to the left to let it past. I thought the must have been an accident up ahead he was going so fast, but horrors, he pulled up fast behind me. Jeebus, for the life of me I couldn't think what I had done. He comes to the window and I'm about to ask but he says "before you say anything I have to tell you I'm Const. D from Coota' "you failed to stop at the stop sign" I'm now looking confused. " Is there a reason you didn't stop at the stop sign" Still confused I said "I thought I did' I must have looked a bit too confused because then I had to have the breathalyser.

He tells me I didn't stop and apparantly he has it on the onboard video.

Off he went to the car and took ages, I think he looked me up for warrants and rego,licence, crim history and when he came back I was $256 poorer.

And then I got 'you wanted to come this way,If you'd listened to me you wouldn't have got a ticket"

ahhh white noise..................shpshshfppshhhhhh

I'm going to go and ask to see the footage. I'm sure I stopped, I had to give way anyway,perhaps my wheels were rolling slightly which technically would not be a stop I guess. Fingers crossed he was wrong.

if only he'd been napping

I like my humans crunchy thanks

I just had this conversation while watching a cooking programme:

hubby: i couldn't eat that... its still raw

its bleeding

thats like cannibals

if they can eat that they could eat a person

(seriously he talks like this.. just keeps adding comments...you think he's done then ...more......)

me: pass me a slice of Les....... mmmm Les

Les: if i had to eat someone, I'd have to have it cooked up

a lot....

crunchy......

like pork crackling......

If you were stuck in say..... a snowstorm for weeks ...and Les has the fire roaring...don't tell him your'e feeling poorly .

He wouldn't eat me he said ...but he'd cook me up for the rest of you.

Music and Memories

This song Sukyaki by Kyo Sakamoto came out the year I was born. 1963. Perhaps it played in the background while I slept in my bassinet, I don't know, but I do remember along with many many many other songs played LOUD in my house that this song was special somehow.

For a start I couldn't understand the words, but that didn't matter I sang along anyway, luckily no Japanese were in hearing, goodness knows what I was actually singing .

The song always gives me a lump in my throat. It reminds me of Sundays at home with mum and dad and my 2 younger sisters when all we had to worry about was getting yelled at or a smack for not doing our homework or chores .

We were always up early, I swear it was still dark!Dad would stomp around and make a racket till we got up. If that failed, he'd just drag us up and out. My youngest sister tried to feign sleep the longest, but dad would rat her out, rip off the blankets, all while shouting or singing some silly breakfast jingle. We'd head out to the dining table bleary eyed and wishing for a pillow while dad was running through brekky options usually involving stone fruit-once the son of an Italian fruiterer always a fruit spruiker. True. today he's in his 70's still asks me if I've had any nice peaches lately.

Sometime after the sun came up...(his only concession to the neighbours) ,the music would start. We had an old radiogram with big speakers, huge speakers. Dad has a huge collection of LP's from the 50's and 60's. I grew up knowing all the words to anything by Johhny O' Keefe,Elvis, Chubby Checker,The Drifters, Cliff Richard,Bill Hayley and the Comets,Fats Domino,dean Martin,Little Patty, Brenda Lee etc etc etc

Mum would be.."turn it down tom" but sometimes she'd get sucked into dads vortex and show us kids how the 50's dancing was done and we'd all have a turn being twisted and swung. Us girls were "twist" experts , if I hear Chubby Checker singing "let's twist again" I'm sooo tempted , but my knees remember before I do and it remains a thought.

I am the singalong queen.

I can't sing though. But ...I am still the singalong queen.

Back to Kyu, he was one of 9....countem 9 children growing up during WW2 in Japan.Kyu's song became a hit with the unusual name that has nothing to do with the song at all. The British record company changed it as the food reference was identifiable and easier to pronounce. Capital records released it in USA and it sold over 1 million copies. He did a world tour but didn't come to Australia.He married, had 2 kids and died in 1985 in a plane crash.

"Ue o muite arukō" or "sukiyaki" is still the only Japanese song to reach number one. It stayed there for 3 weeks in the USA.

The song tells the story of a man who looks up and whistles while he is walking so that his tears won't fall. It's actually about his memories and feelings.

It makes sense that this song triggers memories.

Thanks Kyu, thanks for the memories .